My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
