he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize