Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
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