Whoa Z and x make the same sound
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
