Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
