I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I smell stomach acid.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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