We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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