im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
