lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
This is the prime rib incident all over again
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Semen is not good for contacts.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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