Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
