is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize