Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
