Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize