i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Holy shit dude........stairs
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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