I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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