just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
organizing the empties. That sober.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
You're like the curious george of whores
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
