Define "chronic" masturbator.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize