im so drunk with asians
where?
always
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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