I'm really into asian looking animals
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I haven't been this sober since birth.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
