Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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