What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
My ass is underappreciated
Randomize
