I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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