How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize
