Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
