Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Randomize
