I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
