I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
