I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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