How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize