Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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