If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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