I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
