Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize