I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
