New invention idea: vibrating tampons
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Randomize
