Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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