what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize