My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Randomize
