Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
