I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
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