So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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