Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Randomize
