my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
