she peed on how many people?
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
