I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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