so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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