...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
