So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
