i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize