she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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