I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I need a burrito and a hug.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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